I'm So Over The Leg
by TeamCalliope
Summary: 9x24 Aftermath. Arizona and Callie work their way back to each other. Please feel free to give me feedback.
1. Chapter 1

**I'm So Over The Leg.**

**9x24 Aftermath. This is my first ever attempt at wrtiting fanfiction so I hope it isn't terrible. Please feel free to give me feedback. Sorry it's so short, more to come if people like this. Hope you enjoy!**

**Chapter 1**

Listening to Arizona yell Callie can't help but have mental dialogue going on. Feeling as though her life was crumbling right in front of her and there was nothing she could do to stop it Callie reached out, not for Arizona but for the nearest chair holding on tight to hold herself up as the ground seemed to slip away. She needed to feel something concrete to know this was real. Her wife had really cheated on her with Lauren. Callie gasped for air feeling her stomach turn as she thought back to meeting Lauren and the initial way she had liked her. She could tell that her wife liked her too but she didn't know just how much. Gripping the chair tighter Callie held on to all the love she had left for Arizona.

Of course Arizona didn't notice any of this she was too busy blaming Callie for her missing limb, her leg, the leg that was killing her. She was too busy blaming Callie for saving her life.

"…Then great! Stick out your leg and I'll go grab a bow saw and lets even the score!" Arizona yells before letting out a pained cry.

_What?...leg. The leg. No!_ Callie's mental dialogue is raging. _You cannot blame your cheating on the leg. I'm so over the leg. _Feeling even more betrayed for being faulted Callie cries out "It always comes back to the leg!"

"I trusted you more than anything. I trusted you more than anyone in my life and you decided to cut it off."

"To save your life!"

"You didn't lose anything! I did! I did." Arizona yells heartlessly.

Hearing this takes Callie through another emotional loop. _I lost Mark, Lexie, and my wife. Her body is alive and functioning but she's not my wife. _ _Seriously, how can she be so selfish to not see what I've lost and now what Sophia has lost? _Face dropping Callie looks and feels defeated. She slowly breathes out "Apparently I lost you".

Before Arizona can get another word in Callie speaks up again, this time a bit stronger. "I am so over the leg! -All- you lost was a stupid leg and I lost my wife not to mention, Mark, Lexie and Sofia lost another parent. My wife never came back from the woods, her body did but it's empty. Nothing more than a hollow shell that I tried to love some life back into. So yeah, I made the decision to cut off your leg, the leg that was killing you. You blame me for the leg but you never thanked me for saving your life." Callie chocked back a sob that has been creeping up her throat and peered into Arizona's eyes. Her eyes confirmed everything Callie had just said, there was no reaction from Arizona, her eyes were empty.

Callie looked away unable to handle the fact that she was right. Blinking back tears Callie pressed on. "You keep saying the leg but you blame me for saving you. Dying would have been running away and we both know that's your go to when things get hard." Callie spat out not backing down. "But I saved you and you can't run from this Arizona. You can't run from the fact that you survived a plane crash and lost your leg." Callie took a deep breath as her eyes met a glaring Arizona. "You found a way to run though. You ran away from me with Lauren. Ironic isn't it?" Callie let out a bitter laugh. "You run from the one person who loves you completely. I never stopped or loved you less after the leg. I did everything I could think of to show you that. You ran away from me after asking me not to run."

At that Arizona's eyes softened as she thought back to Bailey's wedding and her failed attempt at giving Callie a romantic night. She had to admit that Callie was nothing but loving, patient, and understanding through all of this. Arizona tilted her head and for the first time tonight really looked at Callie, her eyes were bloodshot and swollen from crying, and her shoulders were slumped forward in defeat after draining herself of all the things she'd been holding back. Arizona also noticed the hurt and confusion in her wife's eyes. She could tell Callie was asking herself where she we wrong. A bolt of guilt shot through Arizona as she continued to study her broken wife, realizing again, for the first time tonight that she did this to Callie. Once again she had hurt Callie after promising not to but this was worse than a broken promise. This was worse than leaving Callie in an airport and there was no going back from here. Arizona couldn't face it. Again she was running. She squeaked out a sad and simple apology and turned to leave. She made it half way to the door before a strong but tender hand grabbed her arm.

"Arizona, wait…"

TBC.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi everyone. I'm so excited and happy that this story is getting such good feedback, since this was my first fanfiction it's really encouraging. So here's chapter 2, as I was writing I kept getting good ideas in the middle of a thought so the story made me a little messy and/or jumbled with the points of views. Sorry. Just trying to get all my ideas out. I sort of know where I want the story to go but if anyone of you have any suggestions PLEASE let me know! All thoughts and comments are welcome. PLEASE CONTINUE TO REVIEW SO I CAN KNOW IF I SHOULD KEEP WRITING. THANK YOU! **

**ENJOY CHAPTER 2.**

**Chapter 2**

"You…we have to face this." Callie begged pulling away the hand she had used to stop Arizona from walking out the dark on call room.

Arizona had been stopped in her tracks with nowhere to go and with no strength left to keep running she gave a single nod of her head as she felt Callie pull away. Dropping all of her defenses she remembered her words to Callie's father during their first meeting. "I'm a good man in a storm." As if right on cue thunder roared outside the on call room window proving her words to be false. _A good man in a storm wouldn't cheat on his wife during an actual storm. _At that she began to laugh.

Turning to face a very confused Callie, Arizona tried to pull herself together and as she watch Callie raise a confused eyebrow she gave up the mystery. "I lied."

"…What?" Callie asked being completely bewildered.

"To your father." Arizona stopped laughing and looked away. "I told him I was a good man in a storm and I…I cheated during a storm." Hot tears threatened to surface as Arizona eyed the floor. "I'm a horrible person and I failed you and Sofia. I didn't protect my girls, the things I love more than anything in the world. I'm not the person my father raised me to be." Arizona admitted beating back the tears that were beginning to fall. She had never been so ashamed of herself.

Callie felt a fresh wave of tears fill her eyes as she listened to Arizona speak. "What you did was horrible and unforgiveable but you, Arizona, aren't horrible. You're lost." Trying to keep her voice from breaking Callie let out a sigh and continued. "I don't need protecting-" Callie fell silent as she heard Arizona speak up again.

"That's one thing I didn't lie about." Arizona interrupted.

"I can't forgive you for this…not now." I know I have to for Sofia's sake but I can't-"

"Callie I-"Arizona struggled for the right words to explain how she made such a huge mistake. "I want you to know it was a mistake and that's all it was. I have no intention of being with-"

It was Callie's turn to interrupt. "Stop!" she yelled. The yelling was unintentional but she couldn't bear to hear how or what made her wife jump into bed with another woman.

Arizona opened her mouth to try to finish explaining but decided against it. Regaining some of the control she had lost with Lauren, Arizona closed her mouth and swallowed her words.

"I'm not ready to hear this." Callie confessed after a moment of awkward silence.

Arizona just nodded admitting to herself that she wasn't ready to say it. She knew that when she did it would hurt Callie all over again.

Callie couldn't handle hearing the name of her betrayer come out of her wife's mouth. _Lauren. _She had been repeating the name to herself all night and it made her sick. She played out a number of different scenarios of how she wanted her confrontation with Lauren to go. In one of them she even pictured herself slapping Lauren in the face before storming off without a word but she knew in her heart of hearts that she would never get physical over something like this. At least that's what history told her. She had her chance to slap Izzie Stevens when she found out about her sleeping with George, her first marriage and only husband but Callie couldn't bring herself to do it. It would change anything if she had and neither Izzie nor George was worth the consequence of fighting a coworker. Callie shut her eyes still hearing his guilty confession. "I slept with Izzie." This was definitely history repeating it's self only this time her marriage was real and this time it hurt a hell of a lot more. It hurt but it didn't break her. Africa broke her and aften then, after all the pieces were put back together Callie vowed to herself that she'd never be broken again not by Arizona Robbins or anyone else. Izzie and George were her fault, she knew what she had with George wasn't real but at the time it was better than being alone. Snapping out of her daze Callie glanced at Arizona who had given up on standing her ground and was seated on the bottom bunk of the on call room beds. Callie slowly made her way to her and sat down beside her wife, she thought being this close to her after everything she'd done would make her uncomfortable but it was more of a natural feeling. That made her realized that she still loved Arizona. As soon as she sat down Arizona began to speak.

"I lost more than a leg." Arizona said calmly after letting all of Callie's words sink in. Her eyes slowly met her wife's and she bit her lip knowing she would have to explain. She took a deep breath before continuing. "I know that I never came back from the woods. I know I'm not the myself, not the person you fell in love with and I'm scared I'll never be that person again." With her voice cracking Arizona swatted away the fallen tears. "The happy, perky, confident parts of me are gone. Now I'm just empty and angry all the time. I'm angry with myself for being this way and for getting on the plane. Angry with Karev for being stupid and selfish and angry at you for making me remember who I use to be and all that I've lost."

"I didn't mean-" Callie tried but was cutoff.

"Every time I look at you I remember. It's like I'm right back in the woods screaming for help but none ever comes. You were right, running would be my go to and death would be easier than living like this but I never felt that way in the woods." Arizona chocked out the last part as she remembered being back in the woods. She thought of the intense pain her leg had caused her and the fear of never getting back to Callie or Sofia, never getting out of the woods. She closed her eyes taking in deep shallow breaths as she heard the familiar sounds of the woods, owls howling, birds chirping, and the unpleasant roar of hungry wolves. She could smell the aroma of blood mixed with the earth's soil. It was her own blood and rotting leg she realized on the second day. She could still hear the distinct cries of Meredith who was crying for her dead sister, Lexie. Mark was in and out of consciousness and making horrible pained noises. She could remember the worn out look of Christina as she attended to everyone but her own needs. Then there was Derek, no one breathed a word about his hand while in the woods. She pictured Callie and Sofia safely at home waiting for her as she often did, it gave her strength. That image kept her alive.

"The image I held in my head of you and Sofia kept me alive and fighting to get back." Tears were streaming down her face when she looks up at Callie. "I ran to you but I left pieces behind. I'm so sorry for everything I've put you through and I love you with all my heart Calliope but I'm not the woman you fell in love with and I may never be again."

"I know." Callie sighed out as she gently wiped away her wife's fallen tears. "I know you haven't been yourself. I'm sorry if I pushed you too hard or pushed you away. I thought that if I treated you as the same woman you would eventually be her again." Callie was looking Arizona in the eyes now and she saw all the hurt and fear she had been hiding.


	3. Chapter 3

**Here's Chapter 3, finally. Sorry that it took so long. Life unfortunately got in the way. So this chapter was a little difficult to write because I wrote bits and pieces of it at different times so I hope it flows good. Also, sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes.**

**Thank you all for the continued support and encouragement, it means the world to me. **

**Enjoy!**

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**Chapter 3**

Seeing all the fear and hurt in Arizona's dead blue eyes Callie feels her hurt breaking even more. She hated seeing her wife this way; broken and shattered with no chances of a full recovery. For months Arizona was pretending to be herself because that's what Callie needed. She needed, wanted, and longed for the woman who boarded a doomed plane all those months ago. She was the woman who kissed her lovingly every night before falling asleep, the woman who got lost in little chocolate eyes and chubby cheeks that was their daughter. Callie wanted so much to hear her name being said in the way that cause her heart to skip a beat, in only a way Arizona could do. Arizona was going through the routine of being Callie's wife with no emotion in her actions and fake smiles. Everyone but Callie noticed, Callie was too needy to notice, too selfish. As guilt washed over her Callie reached for Arizona's hand and gently squeezed it trying to comfort her. "I'm sorry." Callie whispered into the dark on call room but that's as far as it went.

Arizona ignored Callie's soft apology but did find comfort in holding her hand, she held on a bit tighter. "I don't blame you for the leg." She stated after a moment of silence. "I did at first but not now. I get why you did it. I mean-" Arizona's voice faltered as she looked back at Callie seeing nothing but love in her deep brown eyes. "When we had the car accident and you went through the windshield…" She paused taking a deep breath to calm her emotions, "You and Sofia. I was prepared to do whatever it took to save you and her, at least one of you."

Arizona let her mind slip back to the moment Bailey had told her and Mark that they might have to choose between saving Callie or Sofia. Arizona had instantly chosen to save Sofia because she knew without a shadow of a doubt that that is what Callie would have wanted. Sofia was the completion of Callie's dream and that dream had to live. That baby she had fought so hard against, they one she claimed she didn't want was all she needed to hold on to Callie in case she did die. Callie, if only a piece or her would live through Sofia and that was enough for Arizona. Mark thought Arizona was completely mad when she picked Sofia over Callie so he fought her on it. Arguing over it with Mark was the only thing that kept Arizona together until he said the unthinkable, the same words she heard the moment she woke up to only one leg. "…I'm the father! You're not anything...you're nothing!" That's exactly how she felt since then, like nothing. How could she be a proper mother to Sofia or wife to Callie when she only has one leg to stand on? In the recovery months, before she received her prosthetic leg, she was barely able to sit up on her own. If Callie had left her alone for Sofia there was no way she'd be able to care for her. She was nothing to Sofia and didn't try to be anything but a bitch to Callie. She blamed Callie until she realized that she had done the exact same thing when the roles were reversed. She was able to choose to save Sofia so quickly because she knew in her heart Callie would fight to live, she didn't need to save Callie she just needed to remind Callie that she had something to fight for and she did. After the fight with Mark, Arizona made her way into Callie's room and sat beside her bed. Callie was still unconscious using machines to keep her alive. She held the hand of her unresponsive girlfriend and told her all about her beautiful, strong baby girl that was looking for her. She poured her heart out to her, telling her all that Mark had said and how legally he was right. She was nothing to Sofia without Callie and she asked Callie to live for her.

"And I know that's what you did when you gave the order to cut off my leg." Arizona said sheepishly, she was never comfortable saying those words. "You chose the leg over saving me because you knew I would fight to live the way you did. Only I didn't fight from the start." Arizona blinked back guilty tears as she confessed. "I fought against you because that was easier than accepting my fate and I knew you would fight back."

Callie's thumb softy caressed the back of Arizona's hand while she held it and took in everything the blonde had just said. Callie felt a sense of relief and calmness knowing that her wife no longer blamed her making the decision to save her life. She let a smile sweep over her lips as she realized Arizona was completely right. Callie had asked the same thing of her when she told Karev to cut off the leg. It was the only option left and a last resort. Callie knew two things, that Arizona would fight to live for both she and Sofia and that she would fight against being an amputee, she would fight against being anything less than she was before the plane crash. Callie knew Arizona would fight her for making her less and for breaking her promise, a promise that never should have been made.

Before Callie had a chance to reply there was an anxious knock on the door and a familiar voice calling for Dr. Robbins. Callie's smile faded as she was brought back to the reality of the moment. She pulled her hand away from Arizona's as she remembered what had trapped them there in that on call room during the perfect storm.

**TBC…**

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**ooohhhh, who could possibly be at the door? What will happen outside of the on call room? I'm excited to write the next chapter. If you have any suggestions, ideas, questions, or theories please let me know. **

**Thanks, until next time.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Yay! Chapter 4 is finally here. There were a couple of guess as to who was at the door in the end of chapter 3. I hope I didn't disappoint with the revelation. Hehe. This chapter aslo introduces some new characters which posed as a bit of a challenge to keep all the characters in true form. **

**I also have trouble picking sides with Callie and Arizona, I mean I'm a die hard Calzona shipper and putting them against each other is so hard. Which is why sometimes it seems like I'm on Callies side and then Arizona's. I still can't believe Arizona actually cheated on Callie.**

**I hate Lauren.**

**Anyways, enjoy the chapter.**

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**Chapter 4**

Callie instantly missed the warmth of Arizona's hand as she stepped back from her. They had gotten too comfortable in the on call room; they were forgetting what brought them there in the first place.

*Knock Knock* "Robbins you in there?" Came that same familiar voice.

"Y-yeah. I'll be out in a minute." Arizona stammered out as she watched Callie's face harden.

"You can't beat yourself up over what happened with Lauren. We all make mistakes and Torres…" The voice faded into the background as Callie began to yell.

"Karev! You told Karev!"

"I…we…batteries" Arizona tried but didn't know how to tell Callie that not only had she betrayed her by sleeping with Lauren; she also honestly confided that to Alex Karev before her. It didn't matter what Arizona said next, Callie was flying towards the door.

"Save it!" Callie yells angrily before opening the door and revealing a guilty looking Alex Karev. Called gave him a death glare before pushing past him and running down the hall.

Callie didn't stop running until she felt the rain soaking through her clothes. She had somehow ended up outside, looking around she took in her familiar surroundings and let out a long breath. She had been here many times before in this very situation. She was standing in the middle if Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital's attending's parking lot. So much had happened to her in this parking lot; she seemed to be grounded to it. Callie slowly made her way over to a nearby bench wondering if that was the exact bench she stood at watching Erica Hahn walk out of her life r if she had passed it walking away from George after telling him she didn't forgive him for cheating on her with Izzie Stevens. She couldn't believe she was in this situation again. Letting her head slip into her trembling hands Callie let herself cry. As all the old and new feelings of abandonment, hurt, shame, and anger washed over her she let out an angry scream. The thunder seemed to answer her as it roared right alongside of her pained cry. Callie didn't notice she was sitting in the middle of a dangerous storm; she was in too much pain to notice anything outside of her thoughts which is why she jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Torres?..." A gentle voice was calling. "Torres…Callie?" The small voice tried again with a delicate pat on the shoulder. "You know it isn't safe out here…"

Callie slowly looked up to see a very concerned Miranda Bailey. Callie trusted and admired the general surgeon and thought of her as a dear friend but she was the last person Callie wanted to see right now. Bailey had a way of getting her to talk and Callie wasn't ready to admit to herself or anybody else that her wife had cheated on her.

"What is it?...What happened?" Bailey demanded in a caring tone. When all she got from Callie was the broken looks she had seen all too often from her she nudged Callie to get up and led her back inside to safety. The way that Bailey stopped asking for an explanation told Callie that she already knew. "Why did this happen to me again?" She asked in a desperate tone that seemed to fill the deserted cafeteria the two women were now sitting in.

The shorter woman looked up and studied her friend for a moment, choosing her words carefully but let out a sigh knowing that whatever she said wouldn't help. At least not right now. "I wish I knew" was all Bailey breathed out and the room stated silent until Callie asked her what she had been asking herself all night. "What's wrong with me? Why can't I be loved?" She searched Bailey's dark eyes for an answer or a confirmation that she was loved. She broke down into violent sobs as Bailey wrapped her arms around her and spoke softly against her ear.

"You are loved Callie by so many people and there is nothing wrong with you." Miranda paused making sure the Latina was listening. "You are beautiful inside and out and the way you love others is pure and honest. You have a big heart which you wear on your selves but honey there is nothing wrong with you. Sometimes people can't handle being loved that way." Miranda paused again feeling her own heart ache for the fragile woman in her arms. "I don't know the details of everything that has happened but I have notice the visiting attending, the cranial facial specialist, hanging around the Peds ward long after she was needed." Bailey continued with a sigh. "If it's what I think it is then I would say she made Arizona feel like herself, the way she felt before the plane crash. The new girl was just that, new and exciting, she didn't make a fuss over Arizona's leg or ask any questions about the plane crash. She didn't give her the look of pity and concern when Arizona paused at the stairs or was late to the OR. She let Arizona be who she used to be without all the history." Miranda carefully caressed Callie's back getting her to sit up. "Do you understand what I'm saying?" A nod was all Callie offered and for right now that was enough for her and Bailey.

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After slowly making her way over to Alex who was looking bewildered by Callie's actions "She knows." Was all she said before trying to follow Callie.

"You can't catch her now plus the tiny human makers have an ass load of questions for you. I tried to answer but they want you. Boswell managed to…"

"That woman just won't stop!" Arizona stated in a bitter tone making her way to the Peds ward.

"I'll take if from her Dr. Boswell." Arizona commanded as she entered the NICU. Lauren was in the middle of calming down a room full of scared parents, she quickly looked up hearing the disdain in Arizona's voice. The blonde flashed a quick smile to say everything was fine and continued reassuring the parents of the same thing. "Lauren!" Arizona snapped in annoyance "This is my department, my NICU in my hospital and these are all my patients. You are only here for the Sims case so stop trying to make a place for yourself here." Arizona looked straight into Lauren's eyes as she finished. "There is no longer a need for you to be here so you are free to go. This is my life and you are no longer welcomed in it." Arizona's eyes were dark and cold as she look at the other woman, she would let herself feel anything in this moment because that would cause her to show mercy and this woman didn't deserved that from her after what she made Arizona do. Arizona almost smirked at that thought, knowing Lauren didn't make her cheat on her wife but she couldn't take full responsibility now. Lauren was just standing there silently taking in the sight of the other woman, watch her walls go up again. She slowly blinking noticing all eyes was on her waiting to see what her next move would be. She moved her eyes away from Arizona and started for the door, as Arizona sighed in relief she heard an all to confident voice say "I'll be waiting in your office Arizona."

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** So, what did you think?! Lauren wasn't at the door! Sorry to the ones who guessed she was, I'm not ready for Callie to see her yet. Maybe they'll have an encounter in the next chapter. **

**What did you think about Lauren's last sentence? (I know I wrote but ugh, I hate Lauren.) Oh and what do you think of the way I wrote Bailey? too mushy? **

**Thanks for all the support and follows. I'm not sure where to go next to so please leave comments and suggestions.**


	5. Chapter 5 Arizona and Lauren

**Okay so this is an Arizona and Lauren heavy chapter. I know what you're thinking but just give it a chance, Arizona might surprise you. **

**It may seem like Lauren is being justified and/or backed up for her actions but she isn't. I HATE Lauren but I think the way I wrote her helps the flow of the story. **

**Sorry the chapter is so short.**

**PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS STORY, IT WILL HELP DETERMINE IF LAUREN STAYS OR GOES. THANKS!**

**ENJOY.**

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**Chapter 5**

Once everything in the NICU was settled Arizona made her way to her office. She was in no rush to see Lauren again but she wanted that woman gone for good. Arizona had no intentions on trying to fix things with the visiting doctor or have her here any longer than needed because she was nothing to her other than a reminder of the mistake she had made. Callie was the one she loved, the one she wanted to grow old with. Lauren was just a moment of weakness. When she finally reached her office the Peds surgeon stood at the wooden door with her hand on the handle dreading to see the woman on the other side of the door.

Lauren slightly jumped when she heard the click of the door opening. It had been well over an hour since she left Arizona in a mob of angry and concerned parents for a second Lauren wondered if the blonde would make it out alive but she had and she was here now. Lauren couldn't help but smile as she watched Arizona hobble in, her leg was surely bothering her since she had been on it for a while the other blonde noted. She didn't care though, not about the leg or the lack there of. Arizona was beautiful in every sense of the word and the way her eyes sparkled when she smiled took Lauren's breath away. The way that Arizona interacted with each one of her kids showed her that they weren't just patients to the surgeon but that she put herself in place of the parents and cared for each child as if it were her own, Lauren marveled at that. When she first arrived at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital Lauren did her usual prep and homework on her new case, googling the doctors she was going to be working with became the norm for her in hopes of finding the best cure for the patient. By researching the doctors she was able to determine what skills the doctor had master and how her own skills could come into play, the search had always been strictly professional until she met Arizona. After Dr. Avery had formally introduced them Lauren went back to her barrowed office and looked up the beautiful blonde, her heart sank when she discovered Arizona was married and had a family. She read and almost studied everything the articles said about the youngest recipient of the Carter Madison Grant, Arizona's career and talent was certainly impressive. At no point did Lauren consciously decide to go after Arizona but in that moment in the elevator she wanted her more than ever and she knew Arizona wanted her too so she gave in to her desires. She let Arizona know exactly how she felt about her and after some hesitation Arizona reciprocated the same feelings. Lauren loved the night she spent with the woman of her desires, getting to know every inch of the controlled woman. She loved the way she fit so perfectly with the blonde's body. Everything seemed perfect and right until they woke up. Lauren couldn't deny that she was hurt by Arizona's hasty retreat. She knew the woman she had last night was gone and was afraid that she would be come a one night stand that Arizona regretted. Lauren did feel bad for causing Arizona to cheat on her wife but she hadn't held a gun to her head. If she was so in love and happy with Callie she would have continued to walk out, right?

"Hey…" Lauren started and when Arizona didn't respond she countinuted. "I wasn't sure if the parents had eaten you alive or if you were avoiding me." She joked with a light chuckle.

Arizona was definitely avoiding the treacherous woman but she didn't let her know that, instead she just stared blankly at her and waited for the words in her brain to reach her lips.

"Arizona, I'm not going to apologize for what happened with us. I didn't make you do anything that you didn't want to do. Plus, I really liked what happened." Lauren said with a sly smile "You're good."

"Shut up!" Arizona yelled. "You do not get to say those things to me. No, you didn't force me but you certainly pursued me, you knew all along about Callie and my family but you didn't care. You played on my weakness and seduced me. I was going to leave, I was at the door and you baited me with that "You're allowed to lose some control" crap. What we…I did wasn't losing some control, Lauren." Arizona's voice took a bitter tone as she spit out the woman's name and slumped down on the couch in her office feeling the weight of her words. "It was losing all control. The control I had over my emotions and actions was all the control I had left."

Lauren was silent for a while as she studied Arizona, even when she looked so defeated and tired she was beautiful. Lauren closed her eyes reading herself to speak. "Arizona, I like you. I know I've said it before but I can't stop saying it to you or myself. I'm sorry that we went about this the wrong way and that I caused you to hurt Callie and lose all your control but I think what we have…" She was quickly cut off as Arizona turned to face her.

"We have nothing!" Arizona was yelling again and ignored the flinch that Lauren gave at the harshness of her tone. Her skin was crawling as she thought of her and Lauren being something more and she shook with anger at Lauren's casual presumption that they could be a couple. "I don't feel anything for you Lauren, don't you get that? I love Callie, she's my wife. I made vows to her in front of out family and friends and she's the one I see myself growing old with. I am attracted to you, yes but it's merely a physical attraction which to be honest, I, myself don't understand because Callie is breathtakingly beautiful and her body is a work of art." Arizona blushed at the bluntness of her last statement but it was true. She had spent countless hours worshiping Callie's body in the stillness of their room after making love to one another. It was never just sex with them no matter how it was expressed, in those moments it was love in its purest form and nothing compared to that. That night with Lauren was horrible for Arizona; Lauren's body was unfamiliar and cold. There were no sweet whispers of 'I love you' or squeals and giggles when a weak spot was hit. Lauren didn't even get Arizona to climax; she faked it so that it would be over. Lauren was no Calliope. Tears welled up up in Arizona's eyes as she let herself feel the love she had for her wife and it was overwhelming. For months now she wouldn't allow herself to feel anything because she knew that if she did she could forgive Callie, Alex and the stupid plane for everything and she wasn't ready to do that, until now. Under all the anger, sometimes hatred, unforgiveness, and animosity she felt towards her wife was true, honest, undying love for the Latina, and only for her. "I love Calliope." She stated with a smile. "You, Lauren was nothing more than a mistake, a bad choice, lack of control and something I will always regret. I'm sorry if this hurts you but it's all true. I am in love with my wife and our baby girl. I hope she will forgive me and give my sorry ass another chance." Letting out a deep breath Arizona made her way over to Lauren. "Callie and I have something…something magical; you and I are done Dr. Boswell. Thank you so much for all your help with Tyler, that's all I appreciate. You can see yourself out." With that Arizona walked pasted a clearly disappointed Lauren and out of her office in search of her wife.

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**So, what did you think? (I tried my best) Oh and I'm happy Arizona seems to be getting her self together but I don't know if Callie will be so quick to take her back and where's Sofia in all of this?**

**Will Lauren be so easy to get rid of or will she go after Arizona in another way, maybe through Callie? **

**What do you want to happen next?**

**All comments and ideas are welcomed and loved.**


	6. Chapter 6 Defeated hope

**Arizona, Callie, and Lauren together in one chapter, oh my! **

**Finally a long chapter! I really hope you all enjoy this chapter, I had so much fun writing it and please please please review it. I love finding out what you all thought of it and it helps me know if I'm going in the right direction.**

**THANK YOU ALL FOR THE CONTINUED SUPPORT AND FOR THE FOLLOWS/FAVORITES, IT MEANS A LOT TO ME. **

**Chapter 6**

Making her way down the hall Arizona stopped as her thoughts flooded her mind, what was she doing? She couldn't just go to Callie and demand she take her back, Callie didn't owe her a second chance after everything she'd done. Arizona had hurt Callie in the most painful and unforgiving way; she betrayed her trust and gave someone else parts of herself that were only meant for Callie. No, she couldn't just go to Callie and tell her she loved her because at this point her words meant nothing. Arizona had no choice but to show her, to prove to her that she loved her and she was willing to do that at any means necessary. Arizona began to walk again as her head felt a bit clearer and she laughed when she realized were her feet were leading her. Within second she was standing outside the hospital's nursery watching her daughter play.

Sofia was a beautiful replica of her wife. She inherited Callie's beautiful black hair and deep brown eyes. On closer inspection Arizona noticed that you could see Mark in her when she smiled and at first it bothered her that she wasn't featured in her daughter's physical attributes but it stopped bothering her when she was the only one who could get Sofia back to sleep in the middle of the night and when she looked up at her, calling her momma for the first time. In those moments Arizona knew that Sofia knew she was her Momma and she loved her all the same. Arizona was snapped out of her thoughts when she heard Sofia beginning to cry. She looked over at her daughter who had spilled apple juice all over herself and Arizona laughed for the first time in a while recognizing herself in the saddened toddler. _She's a klutz just like me. _Arizona thought to herself and as she watched Mrs. Susie clean her up she wondered if she should go help. She hesitated thinking of Callie, _would she mind_? As thoughts raced through her mind Arizona frowned and her heart sunk ever more realizing Callie wasn't with their daughter. That was the first place she would have thought to find her wife. Sofia could cure anything with her cuddles and kisses but maybe not this time. Arizona looked back at her daughter one last time before making up her mind. _I'm her momma _she thought before opening the nursery door and walking over to her daughter.

* * *

Callie had taken in all of what Bailey said but it didn't help. She only nodded in response when Bailey asked if she understood because she was angry and all she wanted to do what yell but not at her friend, she was only trying to help and Callie appreciated that. Making her way out of Bailey's grasp Callie say up and faced the shorter woman, giving her a small smile before speaking. "I understand Bailey, but that doesn't change the way I feel. I'm angry because for months our lives have been hell because of that damn leg. Five months. It took her five months to be able to look at me with anger in her eyes or letting me touch her in any way. Five months I fought my wife to be my wife and it was exhausting. I love her with everything I have and I turned myself inside out trying to show her that. Just when I thought I was getting her back and stranger swoops in and steals her away in five minutes." Callie threw her hand to her chest to feel her heart necklace Arizona gave her one Valentine's day, she had given her the same one and they wore them every day. It had become a habit for Callie to reach for it in hard moments or when she missed her wife. She began to cry again when she didn't feel it there, for a second she started to panic thinking she had lost it but then she remembered she had taken it off after she saw Arizona's wedding ring pinned to Lauren's scrub top which she assumed was originally Arizona's but was picked up off the floor by the wrong person. Callie shook her head and voiced her thoughts out loud. "After her first day back to work I came home to her playing with Sofia. That was the first interaction between them since the amputation. I thought Sofia would have two parents again and I stopped worrying as much. I feel so stupid for not seeing the truth. Arizona is gone and never coming back. The Arizona Robbins I fell in love with is dead. I'm pissed Bailey, at her for cheating and not being the person I thought she was. I'm also pissed at myself for being so blind and letting my guard down, I'm almost mad for loving her so much." Callie let out a long sigh wiping her tears away and looked away from Bailey who was giving her a look of pity. Neither one of them understood why this had happened to Callie again.

"You have every right to be angry Torres, just be careful what you do with your anger."

Callie looked back at her for further explanation but they were interrupted by Bailey's pager. "911 on my patient."

"Go. I'll be fine, I need to see my baby girl now." Callie gave her a reassuring nod. "Thanks for everything."

"Don't mention it." Baily said as she took off down the hall.

Callie gathered herself together before going to see her daughter in hopes of not alarming her that something was wrong. Callie was drained and didn't want to think any more about Arizona or anything but her beautiful little girl. She just wanted to cuddle with her daughter in the safety of her home, away from the constant noisiness of the hospital and reminders of her wife's infidelity. As she rounded the corner to the nursery she noticed a familiar figure coming towards her and it stopped her in her tracks. All the anger and hurt Callie felt earlier doubled as she stared at the blonde standing in front of her. She looked around the intruder for an escape and mentally cursed herself when she couldn't find one. She was corned and blocked from her daughter; Callie cut her eyes at the smaller woman "Move." She spat out in annoyance.

_Make me _was the first response the blonde thought of but as she looked into Callie's eyes and saw all the rage and anger the woman had towards her she knew Callie wouldn't have a problem doing just that. She might even enjoy it. "No. I want to talk to you." She stated confidently and tilted her head waiting for Callie to reply.

"I have nothing to say to you" Seeing that her statement did nothing to move the smaller woman Callie stepped closer to her and stared her down. "I don't give a rat's ass about whatever sorry thing you have to say" she cleared her throat of the venom accompanying her words. "Now move out of my way or I will move you myself." Callie warned.

The trespasser moved to her right making a space for Callie to get by on her left. Honestly the smaller woman was afraid of all the ways the angry Ortho surgeon could move her but she wasn't backing down. She held her breath feeling Callie brush past her. "You won't even fight for her." She yelled out without even thinking and immediately regretted it as she watched Callie turn on her heels and clench her hands into fist.

"What did you just say to me?" Callie couldn't believe what she had just heard.

"Y-you won't even fight for her. That's the difference between you and me." She hesitated at first but once she started she couldn't stop. "I won't give up on her."

"The difference between you and me is that I'm not a coward." Callie's words were even and calm, and smooth. She smirked at Lauren's confused expression. "You're a coward Lauren. First you go after a married woman then lie to my face about it once you were caught. IF you were that much of a fighter you would have confessed the truth when I saw the ring. The other difference is that you're weak. You preyed on Arizona, you knew about me and the leg. You used the leg to your advantage, playing it off like no big deal and made her feel seen as a whole person again. Normally I would thank you for that but you disgustingly toyed with my wife and slept with her when she was vulnerable. Which also goes back to you being a coward, you knew Arizona would be easy because she needed to feel sexy and attractive with one leg." Callie stopped speaking, trying to collect her emotions. She was shaking with anger as she remembered Bailey's words of caution to her. "The most important difference between us is that I've already won. I'm her wife. She chose to marry me and even though she made a huge stupid mistake she will honor her vows to me, which makes you a weak cowardly loser."

By the time Callie had stopped talking Lauren's face was hard as stone and she was overcome with emotions. Callie was completely right about her and Arizona wanting to honor her vows to her wife but she couldn't give up the fight. "Since she was so easy it must be because you're doing something wrong. Something I corrected." Lauren said with a smirk.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Callie could feel her blood boil.

"When was the last time she wanted you, begged for you?" She asked with a teasing smile and smirked when Callie's eyes darkened. "My guess is before you made the call to cut off her leg." Feeling like she was winning she let a small smile take over her face.

"Shut up! You have no idea what you're talking about."

"I know that Arizona wanted me and she peeked almost instantly, like she hadn't been touched in months."

That was the last straw; Callie lost every piece of control she had left. Her palms began to sweat as her heart pounded in her ears. She shut her eyes trying to stop the room from spinning. Rage and anger was all she felt and it took over every sense she had. Before she knew it her body was acting on its own.

* * *

Arizona grew even more concerned when the clock in the hospital's nursery struck 5:00. The nursery would be closing in 30 minutes and Callie was yet to be seen. Watching her daughter thoughtfully Arizona could sense Sofia was looking for her mommy. Arizona had a mental debate with herself trying to decide whether or not to take Sofia home or to go find Callie. She wondered if she could still call the apartment she shared with Callie home, was it still her home? Will she remain as part of Callie and Sofia's family or will she be alone out on the streets. She shook her head ridding herself of those questions and the fear that came along with the possible answers. Arizona knew she had to face them and plan for any consequence Callie would give her but she couldn't do it now, not when she was being a mother to [perfect little girl. "Hey princess, how about we go find mommy?" Arizona giggled as Sofia looked up from her toys, smiled, and clapped her chubby little hands. "I'll take that as a yes." Arizona stood up and collected all the little girl's belongings before hoisting her daughter on her right hip. She walked them over to the day before walking out. Arizona was almost in a trance thinking at all the places Callie could, before she could get a clear idea loud familiar voice pulled her out of her head.

"_Shut up! You have no idea what you're talking about."_ She began to walk in the direction of the sound as her wife's voice rand in her ears. She noted the anger and sadness in the latina's voice and it made her cringe. She could only be yelling at one person.

"_I know that Arizona wanted me and she peeked almost instantly, like she hadn't been touched in months." _Arizona's own anger grew as she heard the voice of the woman who she was trying so hard to forget. She almost didn't notice the heated silence as her thoughts clouded her mind. She quickened her steps and as soon as she rounded the corner she saw the tan hand of her wife go across the pale face of her mistress, twice. She momentarily stopped walking from the shock of seeing Callie slap Lauren, she just couldn't believe Callie hit her, she never even seen her wife swat a fly before. Without thinking she shielded Sofia's face and held the child closer to her, she hoped she hadn't seen her mommy hit someone. Sofia wouldn't understand and it would break both of their hearts if she became afraid of Callie. As the little girl stirred in her arms she began to walk towards the two women fighting because of her. She only hoped Callie was fighting for her. For a second she thought Callie would strike Lauren again so she placed a soft hand on her arm. "Callie…" Callie didn't flinch at the touch or respond at all, she, herself was in shock by her actions.

"You bitch! You hit me!" Lauren cried out holding her reddened cheek. "Arizona, I didn't…"

"Stop!" Arizona said harshly cutting Lauren off. "What the hell are you still doing here? I told you to leave and that I want nothing to do with you. I meant that. I also told you that I was going to fight for Callie because I'm in love with her. I meant that with all my heart. Now, will you do us all a favor and leave!" It was more of a demand that a question. Arizona's hand was still on Callie's arm, now gripping it for support and it calmed her down a bit when she felt Callie's body relax at her words. Lauren did nothing but stare at them for a long moment. For the first time she saw that she was fighting a losing battle and sighed. "Arizona…I am sorry." She provided before walking past them and out of the hospital.

For a moment nothing was said between the emotionally drained wives. Sofia looked between her mothers and tensed in Arizona's arms feeling something was wrong, the blonde gently caressed her daughters back to calm her. Arizona was the first to speak "Callie, we should get her home." She said the statement with fear of rejection and hope of starting over.

Callie finally turned to see her daughter in Arizona's arms and gave the girl a genuine smile. She locked eyes with Arizona for a moment before stepping closer and plucking the toddler from Arizona's tight grasp. "Sofia and I no longer have a home, not with you. I've booked us a room at a hotel for the night and will make more permanent arrangements in the morning. I would stay at Mark's but that's too close to you." Callie blinked back tears ignoring the ones she saw in Arizona eyes and turned to leave.

"Callie! Please! Please don't take her away from me. I need her, I need you. I love you both so much. Please don't do this." Feeling like she was losing everything Arizona couldn't hold back the sobs.

The desperation in Arizona's voice cut through Callie like a knife and she hugged Sofia closer to her, she had to stay strong for her. "I'm not taking her away from you, you're still her mother as much as I am but we can't be a family." Callie broke as the last words left her mouth, she wanted to fight for her family but she had no more fight left in her tonight. "At least not now" Without turning back to look at her sobbing wife Callie walked out of the hospital feeling defeated but left behind some hope for them.

* * *

**OMG! CALLIE SLAPPED LAUREN! GO CALLIE! **

**Okay, so what did you think?! Were you happy about Callie's decisions, was she right in leaving? **

**I have a few ideas on where to take the next chapter but please tell me what you want from it. Also there are going to be some more characters coming in the story from another show(close to Grey's Anatomy), any ideas who? **

**Chapter 7 should be up soon depending on reviews. **

**Thanks for reading, until next time.**


	7. Author's Notes on Reviews

**Sorry, no new chapter but soon, I promise.**

**Anyways, tonight I'm writing to address some of the reviews that were left. I have no problem with people sharing their thoughts or feelings on my fic but seriously, this was a little much…There have been some claims that the title of the fic is insulting and offensive. **

**Examples:**

Guest 8/15/13 . chapter 6

I'm not gonna bother reading this fucking fanfic. I'm just here to say that the title is offensive and that you should be ashamed of yourself because this seriously is a big insult to people who lost their limbs. You're an ableist,that's what you are.

Guest 8/14/13 . chapter 1

Callie screaming I am over the leg - you lost a stupid leg is exactly why Arizona freaking went to someone else - Your name gives you away you clearly are going to be prejudiced when you are a callie fan so why bother fucking writing you dumb idiot

Guest 8/14/13 . chapter 1

The title of this Fic put me of immediately. To be honest it's a horrible title. Arizona lost a leg, has PTSD and had to put up with a wife who while yes tried at times basically bulldozed her and failed to noticed just exactly how sad and depressed and how Ok she wasn't - The title is offensive and you should be ashamed of yourself - I'm over stupid authors who can't write

**My response:**

**I AM SO DEEPLY SORRY IF THE TITLE OF THIS STORY HAS INSULTED, HURT OR OFFENDED YOU. THAT WAS NOT MY INTENTION IN WAY. **

**I chose 'I'm so over the leg' as the title because of what Callie saids in her rant to Arizona when they were getting ready for Bailey's wedding. I have no problem changing the title, I just can't think of anything so if you have a better title for my story than please make a suggestion and it will be changed. **

**Also, I am a diehard Calzona fan. I love and support Arizona and Callie equally, 100%. If that is not reflected in my story than again, I am sorry. I think if you follow the story you'd know that but if not, the end result will show that. I know Arizona has a lot things to work through and PTSD plays a huge part in that, I haven't really added that to the story because I was researching it and it want to write it in until I fully understood the affects. I will be writing in PTSD and phantom leg affects pretty soon.**

***I know I'm not a great writer, this is my first ever fanfiction and I did it purely for me and to get all my feelings out surrounding Calzona and the season 9 finale. If you don't agree with my story than please make suggestions on how it can improve or don't read it, It is not okay for you to hide as a guest and try to belittle me for writing my story my way.***

**Okay, I think that's everything. Oh, wait. I forgot…**

**TO EVERYONE WHO WROTE SUPPORTIVE AND ENCOURAGING REVIEWS, THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART! YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME AND I CAN'T WAIT TO GET CHAPTER 7 TO YOU!**

**LOVE, PEACE, AND HAPPINESS **

**-LALA**


	8. Chapter 7 Help

**Hey! Here's chapter 7 finally! I'm so sorry it took so long, Work and life have both been crazy and super busy. This chapter is sort of a middle man to telling the next part of the story and I'm really excited about that. This chapter also didn't come out as I hoped it would but I hope you enjoy it and I promise chapter 8 will be posted soon.**

**TO EVERYONE WHO SUPPORTS ME AND MY STORY, THANK YOU SO MUCH. THE REVIEWS ON THE AUTHORS NOTES BLEW ME AWAY AND STILL MAKES ME SMILE. THERE WILL BE NO TITLE CHANGE BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE ARIZONA USED THE LEG WAY TOO MUCH AS AN EXCUSE AND I AM OVER THAT. SO ONCE AGAIN, THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT! (I swear I'm not yelling, just happy)**

* * *

Hours later Callie found herself tucking her sleeping daughter into a strange bed and wishing she didn't have to uproot her from her home. Sofia had cried herself to sleep asking for her momma. It broke Callie's heart even more to watch her daughter cry herself to sleep but there was no way to explain what had happened in a way she understand so she did the thing she could, she held Sofia close to her and cried with her. They stayed like that until Callie realized she was the only one still sobbing and she was holding on to Sofia so tightly she was afraid she would crush her. Once Sofia was safely tucked into bed the brunette made her way to the bathroom, she was in desperate need of a hot bath in hopes of trying to relax so that she could sleep. As she entered the bathroom she gasp in surprise at how empty the hotel bathroom was, none of her things were there, the bathtub was free of baby water toys and rubber duckies but most of all there was absolutely no sign of Arizona. Their home bathroom always smelled of Vanilla because of Arizona's favorite candle burning on the window seal. There were no amputee chairs or bars in the bathtub. After taking everything in for a moment Callie leaned over the tub to start the water, as she threw in some hotel bubble bath her thoughts of relaxing were pushed aside when one thought shook her to the core, _there is no Arizona. _"No." she practically shouted out loud "Not tonight", tonight she needed to forget and relax. She quickly undressed and made her way in the tub letting out a sigh of relief as sunk under the water.

* * *

Arizona had finally made her way home. After standing in the spot that Callie left her in for more than an hour she found herself slumped in Alex's arms as he tried to talk her into to going home. Arizona had stood her ground for a while, she was leaving that spot until Callie came back for her…she had to but when Alex stood in front of her and grabbed her shoulders making her hear him telling her that Callie was long gone she had nothing left to stand on. She collapsed in Alex's arms and let him help her home. Once he made sure she was okay alone for the night Alex made his way back to the hospital and Arizona was alone in her empty apartment. Sitting on the edge of the bed she frantically tore the prosthetic leg off of her swollen and very sore residual limb. She dug her fingers deep into the remaining parts of her left leg trying to soothe the pain. _At least now my insides match my outside, broken. _Arizona thought as she continued to massage away the pain and let out a frustrated groan, it was taking longer for the pain to subside than when Callie massaged her leg. Giving up on getting any relief from the swollen limb she scooted back on the bed until she reached her pillows. Arizona willed herself not to cry as she stared up at the ceiling listening to the emptiness of the apartment. She missed the cooing sounds of Sofia sleeping through the baby monitor and the way Callie felt laying next to her. After the plane crash Callie would lie as close to her as possible without touching her but they could still feel the warmth of each others bodies, tonight Arizona was cold. Staring at Callie's empty side of the bed she felt her chest tighten and tears spring to her eyes, Arizona grabbed Callie's pillow and hugged it close to her body. "I'm so sorry" she whispered into the emptiness of the room before crying herself to sleep.

* * *

Callie sat up in bed thinking of the events of the night and she let the guilt wash over her as she heard the desperation in the blonde's voice begging her to stay. She wanted nothing more than to stay, to take her wife and baby girl home but she couldn't. Her wife was no longer only hers; the most sacred part of her was now shared with Lauren. Callie wiped away a few fallen tears as she began to kick herself for walking away. She was never been one to walk out on a confrontation or away from a loved one but after all that had happened she didn't see any other way out. She hadn't completely given up on Arizona or their marriage but she felt like she'd been in the boxing ring all day and round one just ended with causalities. Looking over at a sleeping Sofia the brunette knows what she has to do. She has to fight for Sofia, whatever that means she has to give her perfect little a family so she makes up her mind to try again with Arizona but this is the last time because although this is affecting Sofia now, she's still unharmed by it. She's too little to understand what's really going on and what her momma has done or been through. Arizona hasn't hurt Sofia and Callie promised the sleeping child that she would never let her. Although she wasn't ready to start fighting again she wasn't giving up, this wasn't the end. She was going to fight to save her marriage because despite everything she was still in love with Arizona.

As she continued to think things through she went over her relationship with wife after the plan crash. She knew Arizona was still angry over losing her leg even though she was beginning to deal with it and move on but she didn't realize that she was still being blamed for the making the decision to cut of the leg. Thinking back to their argument in the on call room Callie went over everything that had been said and felt a rush of guilt wash over her as she recalled the things she shouted at her wife. That wasn't how things were going to get fixed between them, but then again nothing really did get fixed between them. There was never any reconciliation with any of the problems they faced, they were only able to get past things when something worse or bigger had happened. Thinking back to when Arizona didn't want kids they couldn't find a solution so they broke up until they survived the shooting together but the problem wasn't fixed. Arizona agreed to have kids with her but she still didn't want them which is why they never talked about it. Then when Arizona left for Africa and came back Callie wouldn't give her the time of day until she found out she was pregnant with Sofia and suddenly Arizona was part of that plan. Callie sighed in frustration when she realized there never was any real reconciliation. The couple never worked on fixing things they just bandaged up the hurt and moved on. The cheating and the hurt, mistrust, anger, and guilt that comes from it couldn't simply be banded up. They need help to work this out properly and deal with all the underline pain and problem form before. They need to let someone else in to guide them and give them a safe place to go through all the emotions and give them the tools needed to deal with it all. Some serious work had to be and Callie was willing to do it, she just hoped Arizona was too.

There was only one person Callie could trust to help her with this and she picked up the phone and dialed her friend's number.

Callie glanced at the clock when she heard a groggy voice pick up the phone and say hello. "I'm sorry to call so early, I couldn't sleep and I need your help." Callie held her breath waiting for the angry reply. She knew her friend hated waking up early.

"Callie? What is it, what's wrong?" the voice was concerned not angry and it made Callie feel expose and vulnerable.

"Yes, it's me. I need your help…." Callie's voice lingered for a second as she tried to finish her sentence. "Um, Arizona cheated." Callie fought back tears as she heard the shocked gasp of her friend. No one will believe her wife would ever do something like this and if they did Cali feared they would think it was her fault. "Yeah, so I need the number to your psychiatrist friend uh, Veronica, or something?"

"Callie….I'm so sorry-"

"Addison please, just the number for now."

"Ah, yeah, okay, Violet….that's her name. I'll text it to you at a decent hour" Addison bit her lip as she waited for Callie to reply to lame joke and smiled a bit when she heard her smirk on the other end. "Oh and Callie?"

"Yeah?" She nervously held her breath trying to prepare herself for whatever was about to come out her friend's mouth.

"I'm here."

There was a long pause as Callie gathered her thoughts and emotions, for some reason she wasn't expecting that. Mark and Arizona were her people and Callie was feeling so alone from losing them that she had shut other people out, Addison included and her kind gestured told Callie that she still had people. "I know, Thank you Addison." After hanging up with Addison and having a bit of a game plan Callie felt lighter. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep feeling like she still had a chance at her family.

* * *

**So what do you think? Do you like the idea of bringing in Violet and having them go to therapy? Will Arizona agree to it? **

**Please review and let me know what you think about all of this. Please let me know if you have any ideas for the story, I'll try to incorporate as many ideas as I get...Until next time. **


	9. Chapter 8 I'll do anything

**I told you chapter 8 would be here soon. **** This chapter was so much fun to write because of all the dialogue between Callie and Arizona (also heartbreaking, I just want them to kiss and make up already but I know that isn't possible.). I hope you all enjoy the conversation they share, please review the conversation so I can know if I have them going down the right path. **

**The reviews on chapter 7 were awesome and again, I thank you all for the continued support and reviews. You all are awesome! Without further ado…**

Callie sat up in bed hearing Sofia cry in her sleep. The exhausted brunette squinted as she tried to focus her eyes on the clock. The red digits read 4:30, just an hour after she had finally fallen asleep. She sighed as she made her way over to Sofia; she wasn't frustrated with the lack of sleep she had been getting but with what was bothering her daughter. The little girl had relentlessly asked for Arizona since the night they left her in the hospital. It killed her that she couldn't give Sofia what she wanted, what she deserved. At this point Sofia had waken up throughout the nights still asking for Arizona so at a last resort to get her baby girl to rest Callie picked up her phone dialing the number she knew by heart and held her breath. Apart of her wished the call would go straight to voice mail, it was nearly 4 am after all and the other part thought of everything that was to be said. Giving this too much thought she didn't hear Arizona say call her name the first two times after she answered. "Callie! What's wrong?! Is it Sofia?" As she slowly registered what was being said and detecting the fear in Arizona's voice Callie quickly answered. "No, I mean yes…Sofia isn't hurt she just wants you and can't sleep."

Letting out a sigh of relief Arizona swiftly came up with a solution. "Give her the phone."

Callie nodded in agreement, knowing Arizona couldn't see her but that was all she could do so she put the phone up to Sofia's ear and waited. She watched her daughter instantly calm down at her momma's voice. Callie held the phone up to Sofia's ear until she was sound asleep. Before she knew it Callie had the phone up to her own ear listening to Arizona and realized she was reading Sofia's favorite book "If you Gave a Mouse a Cookie.' She had to stop herself from chuckling when Arizona changed her voice from normal to a high pitched squeak making the mouse come to life. When she heard Arizona sniffle while turning the page she felt her heart drop, she knew this was hard on Arizona as well but this made her feel for wife. She wanted to be there with her and for her but she couldn't, Callie was still so mad at her and hurt by her betrayal. For the first time since Arizona answered the phone Callie began to wondered why, _was she up already, if she was why? Was her phantom leg syndrome acting up? Was she in pain?_

All of these questions raced through her mind and she wanted to ask her but the answers wouldn't change anything. She quickly cleared her throat and stated the obvious "She's asleep…thanks."

"Oh, great. Anytime. Thank you for letting me talk to her. I miss both of you so much.' Arizona thought she finally had a chance to have Callie listen to her so once she started speaking she didn't stop, there was so much left to be said. "Callie I-" Her heart fell as Callie cut her off.

"No. This was for Sofia, I'm not ready to talk to you yet." Callie was reeling with emotions but her statement was honest, she wasn't ready to talk to Arizona about everything but she knew she would have to eventually.

"Oh, um okay. I'm sorry I didn't mean to push it." Arizona bit her lip as she nervously waited for Callie to respond. A part of her expected to be hung up on.

"I know that we have to talk…we have to figure the out but I can't do that now." Callie took in a sharp breath and continued. "And not like this."

"You mean not over the phone?"

"No, I mean…." Callie's voice trailed off as she thought of wanting the couple to go to therapy. It has been a few days since Callie had spoken to Addison and requested Violets number. Addison had kept her word and texted the anxious brunette the number when she had woken up later in the day but Callie hadn't bothered to use it. She was staring at the pad of paper she wrote the number on feeling her heart race, she knew from previous conversations how Arizona felt about therapy and she feared that her wife wouldn't agree to go. Although Callie only called Arizona tonight to help with Sofia she knew they needed to have this conversation, why not now? So while holding her breath Callie blurted out "We need help, I want us to go to therapy so that we can get the help we need. So will you go? I'll be there too. We'll go together and maybe this will help. Will you?" Callie knew she was rambling but she couldn't stop her mouth from make making words, she wanted Arizona to say yes so badly.

Hearing Callie abruptly blurt out her rambling question Arizona quietly giggled to herself thinking back to the way Callie had asked her to move in with her. When Callie was nervous her mouth worked on it's own and it was adorable. As Arizona snapped out of her daze and really listened to what her wife was asking of her she felt nausea. There was only one considerable answer to the blonde and after a long awkward pause she answered the question. "No Callie, I told you before I don't want to see a shrink." Arizona said in a shaky and somewhat angry voice.

"Yes you did but that was right after the plan crash. You didn't want to see a shrink about your leg but this isn't just about you." Callie sighed in frustration not wanting to push Arizona in to anything because that wouldn't do any good either. "Arizona this is about our marriage, a marriage we're trying to save!"

Letting out a long breath she didn't know she was holding Arizona gulped and tried to reason again. "I know, I know but Callie can't we figure this out together, just you and me? I'll do anything to have you forgive me and to fix out marriage."

"No we can't. We tried fixing our relationship before and look how great that turned out." The latina's voice was angry and bitter but the hurt was still detected in it, she was trying so hard no to cry over the phone.

"I…Callie…" Hearing the range of emotions in Callie's voice told her that this was the only way, her only chance to get her wife back and that left her speechless.

"We skip steps Arizona. We don't solve our problems; we overlook them and move on." "We…I can't just move on from this."

"What do you mean by skipping steps, what steps?"

"I don't know, that's why we need help."

"Okay…." Wiping off her sweaty hands on her pants leg she nodded in agreement. This was the only way so yes she would do it no matter how much she hated the idea of airing their dirty laundry to a stranger Arizona had to do this because she meant it when she said she'd do anything. Taking a deep breath she repeated it again, to herself and Callie who hadn't responded yet. "Okay, I'll do it. I'll go to therapy with you." _I can't run anymore._

"Great!" Callie couldn't hide the gratefulness in her voice or the giant smile on her face.

"Yeah. I'll try this for you because I want to prove that I love you and that I'm willing to fight for us."

"Thank you and Arizona?" Callie heard the sincerity in her wife's voice and it made her want to reach through the phone and wrap her up in her arms. She craved to hold Arizona the way a pregnant person craves ice cream and not having that craving met was driving her mad.

"Yeah?"

"I forgive you. I do but I'm also mad at you. I'm just so mad and I'm trying not to be but I am. So mad and hurt."

"Okay…I am so deeply sorry. I can't say that enough and I know it doesn't change things but I am so sorry I hurt you. I love you Calliope."

"I know…Me too….I love you too."

Hearing Callie say she loved her back took her breath away, she was expecting her to yell, say the she couldn't love her because if she did she wouldn't have cheated but she didn't. Callie still loved her and that was enough for her in that moment, whatever else happened that was all she needed. "But that doesn't change things."

"No it doesn't. I mean it when I say it but we can't go back to before…loving you doesn't fix things. "

"I know. I just miss you and Sofia so much."

"We miss you too but we won't be coming home for a while, not until we get the proper help."

"Can I see her? I mean outside of her being at daycare."

"Um, I don't think that's a good idea. It's so hard getting her to understand that you can't be home with us."

"Callie please! I…please."

"….I'm not keeping her from you…she doesn't understand and I don't want to hurt her when I have to bring her home."

"I understand that but I'm her momma Callie and only seeing her between rounds isn't enough for me. I need her, I need to know I still have a family."

"Alright." Callie was genially thinking this through and almost smiled when she came to a conclusion. She had two nights where she would need care for Sofia because of a bone and cartilage training she would be giving to residents interested in Ortho. "How about Tuesdays and Thursdays you can pick her up from daycare and keep her for the night."

"Really?" This time it was Arizona who couldn't contain the happiness in her voice.

"Yes but now that only leaves Friday nights open for therapy…will that work for you?"

"Yeah."

"Good. Well I'll call Violet to see what timeslot she has available and let you know." "Do you mind if I call tomorrow night?"

"No…I wouldn't mind at all."

"Just to say goodnight to Sofia"

"Right, of course. It's no problem."

"Okay. Well it's pretty late now, I think I should go."

"Goodnight Callie."

"Goodnight. Thanks again for calming Sofia down."

"Anytime." Arizona slightly smiled as she hung up the phone. It was 6:30 when Arizona hung up the phone but she didn't mind, she was too happy and filled with hope to care that she only had an hour left before she would have to get up for work. She as quickly as possible put on her prosthetic leg and made her way to Sofia's room to make sure it was perfect for her arrival tomorrow night. Arizona couldn't help but smile as she straightened things in the little girl's room; she wanted it to be perfect and normal for her to be back. Once the room was to her satisfaction the blonde sat down in the rocking chair and picked up a photo of her, Callie and Sofia before the plane crash. Arizona stared at herself in the photo; the happy smile plastered on face was enough to send chills up her spine. She wanted to be that person again, she wanted to be really to be that wife for Callie again and the momma that Sofia deserved. As tears welled up in her eyes she made a promise to herself and her family that she would really try in therapy, she knew she could never be that person in the photo again but she didn't have to be this miserable mess either. After the amputation there were many suggestions for her to see a therapist so that she could have a "balanced recovery" but there was nothing wrong with her mind. She didn't lose memory or have any sort of head trauma, she lost part of her leg and that was all the recovery she wanted to focus on so she declined each offer. Looking back therapy could have really helped; it could have at least kept her from being such a monster to Callie in the beginning. She couldn't see how much Callie was trying or how she was pushing her away because she was stuck inside her own head, her mind had turned against her and held her hostage. She shook her head as to shake away the unwanted thoughts and feelings, _That doesn't matter now, I have another chance to make it right. _She thought as she set down the photo and went to get ready for work.

Climbing into bed with Sofia Callie wrapped her daughter protectively in her arms giggling when the sleeping girl let out a small snore. As she watched her daughter sleep the conversation she just had with Arizona flooded her mind along with an array of emotions. The first and most obvious emotion was Happiness, or something close to it. She was happy that Arizona agreed to go to therapy and that their talk went so well. Before making the phone call every time Callie thought about talking, seeing, or being around Arizona in any way she would get angry and think about all the awful things she could say to her to make her feel just a portion of the pain Callie was in but the moment Arizona answered phone she heard it in her voice all the pain she was truly in and all Callie wanted to do was be able to take it away. That's when she knew for a fact that she did indeed still love Arizona as much as she always did, not an ounce less but she was still so mad at her. Letting out a sigh she mad a mental note to talk about her anger in therapy because she didn't know what to do with it. All the anger and hurt was just there inside of her causing her to shut down. She was still able to be a good mother for Sofia but everything else was slacking. She was still a rockstar at work with her surgeries but she was so withdrawn from everyone that her patients complained about her bedside manners and asked out doctors behind her back if she was competent enough to have successful surgeries. Bailey was the only one still trying to be somewhat of a friend to her, all the others had given up on her and Arizona but Callie hadn't. She knew what was holding her back and she was determined to get help and be a better version of herself and a better wife for Arizona. That's what the therapy thing was all about, she knew from the start that she didn't know how to properly support Arizona after losing her left leg but when she proposed going to therapy then her wife said no in a heartbeat and stuck to it, there was no convincing her so Callie dropped it and did the best she could for her wife but clearly that wasn't enough. Closing her eyes letting sleep overtake her she promised herself that this time she would learn how to take care of her wife in the proper way and to try to understand all that she has been through and not to push her to feel better. _The leg is everything because she's my everything. _That was the last thought she had before surrendering to sleep.

**Yay! You read it. Hehe. What did you think? There were a lot of feels in this chapter and yay yay for Arizona agreeing to go to therapy. Let me know what you think, liked, and didn't like. Until next time…. **


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